What NOT to DO When It Comes to Connecting with Your Teens?
The teenage years of a child are difficult for any parent to deal with. Also, having been a teenager once, you know how daunting these adolescent years can be for your child. Now, with your little one on their way to adulthood, you have to do all you can to make this transition as smooth as possible. Here, we at Excelsior American School, one of the best schools in Gurgaon, reckon communicating effectively with your teenage child to help strengthening your bond with them. This way, you can also share a healthy relationship with your kids. Here, in this article today, we are not going to give you a few more tips on “what to do” for connecting with your teens because if you are here, we know you must have already come across a lot of such tips so far. Instead, we will share with you some crucial “Don’ts” in this regard, keeping note of which will help strengthen your bonding with your teen kids. So, delve into it without any further ado.
- Do Not Invade their Privacy
Just like you need your space, your teenagers need their privacy too. So, do not go snooping around their bedroom or reading their messages. If you do so, you will create discord, which can lead to disturbing scenes at home. Trust them! Allow them to have their conversations with their friends and do not disturb them during such times. By giving them their much-needed privacy, you even convey that you trust them to make the right choices. In all, allow them to develop their identities and support them in doing so.
- Do Not Break the Rules You Set
Your job as a parent includes protecting your child and promoting a nurturing environment for facilitating their growth. To this end, you have to set healthy boundaries to make your teenage child know their limits. Well, your child will surely try to push the limits, albeit you have to continue to reinforce the rules and discipline them.
There’s no denying that every parent sets boundaries depending on their child’s personality. See to it that you uphold the boundaries you set for your child to follow suit. If you fail to do so, your child gets the advantage over you.
- Do Not Ignore Your Child’s Emotions
Parents should avoid dismissing their child’s emotions and disregarding their real-time experiences as simply a phase. Instead, try to respect your child’s feelings and listen to what they have to say.
Furthermore, if your child relates their problem to you, do not make the mistake of offering advice immediately. This is because children often only want you to listen and show support. In fact, you can step ahead and ask them how they want you to support them. In doing so, you give your child the power to decide what they need from you. All this goes a long way in deepening the ties with your teenager.
- Do Not Make Them Feel Guilty or Shameful
Your child may be your world, though you cannot always agree with their choices. Because, as a parent, your job also includes disciplining their behavior. Nonetheless, do not make your child feel guilty or shameful when doing so. Else, they could start feeling inadequate and low in self-worth. In addition to that, they will fear you and sneak behind your back.
Thus, when it comes to disciplining your teenage child, you must highlight their wrongful behavior in person, not in front of others. Do not attack them, just highlight your expectations without putting them down.
- Do Not Betray Their Trust
Winning your child’s trust should be important to you. That is because they are then more likely to tell you all about what is happening in their lives.
There are different ways of earning the trust of your child. For starters, you have to first convince them that you are there for them unconditionally. Besides, you can make your teenager trust you by keeping their secrets and not revealing them to anybody if they have asked you not to do so.
On the other hand, if your teenager cannot trust you, you will never know their problems. Moreover, they will remain aloof, which can negatively affect your relationship with them.
- Do Not Push Them to Talk to You
At times, your teenage child may not want to talk to you. In such cases, you must leave them alone for some time to let them process their feelings. Remember, if your force your teenager to do anything, they could rebel or withdraw. However, you can avoid such situations by conveying to them that you are there for them whenever they need you.
The teenage years of your child can be challenging. Thus, the need is for you, as their parents, to be there with them and make them know that you have their back. We at Excelsior American School, one of the best schools in Gurgaon, would like to advise the parents to support their teenage children during this fleeting phase. Note, the way you treat your child during their teenage years will not just define your relationship with them during their adult years but also how well they grow into respectable and responsible adults.